I recently listened to a podcast by Dr Nikki Goldstein about marriage that challenges traditional ideas and discusses a new option to do with how a marriage works.
Our idea of marriage has already changed a lot. Men can now marry men, and women can marry women, so we’ve already added some flexibility to the concept.
I firmly believe in marriage (and after all it’s my job to plan them!) but we do live in an ever-changing and diverse world.
This post investigates the idea of a ten-year marriage contract #tenyearmarriagecontract
The idea is that, after ten years of marriage, both parties have the option to renew the contract or not. Could be quite refreshing?
To me it sounds like a great way to put into writing your expectations for the marriage, which could help with communication and keeping the passion alive, and might help both parties to feel more engaged in the marriage.
I was really intrigued, so had a look at the kinds of things people were putting in these ten-year contracts.
The beauty is that the contract can be highly customised to the couple, potentially including things to do with money (how much to spend vs saving?/joint account? etc), how to resolve conflicts, whether to try for children, childcare arrangements etc.
Other things that came up included how much you expect each other to look after their health and body, and some couples included things about the time they’d spend together, such as going to a favourite restaurant once a week.
How many times have you heard couples say ‘we never spend quality time together’? Stating expectations from the beginning might help couples become closer and continue to grow together as the years go by.
While I consider myself a realist and do find traditional marriage appealing, the idea of mapping out what you want in the future sounds interesting, and much of my blog is about asking what you really want from your marriage.
With the ten-year contract you can still have the same ceremony you dreamed of and you can still change your name; the only difference is that you’re signing a ten-year contract that you are likely to renew in ten years, when you can have another celebration!
Is a ten-year marriage contract something you’d consider? Share your thoughts below!